Wicked Witch of the West...Me a Stepmother

Once upon a time I was that Stepmother...the Wicked Witch of the West but in my case in the East since I live in NY.

Today as I look back I can happily say out loud and proud that I am no longer that Witch. I mean if you ask my girls they might say I still have my bi polar/evil step motherly moments but I am truly happy where we are now.  I can tell you it has not been an easy road and being the new girlfriend, then new wife, having kids with my their daddy or becoming the stepparent was not something easy for any of us. It was a mayor adjustment for everyone, specially for me who has always been free spirited and liked by everyone. Having 2 young children dislike you without even knowing you took a chip off my ego (temporarily) but honestly I can say I would do it all over again in a heart beat to have what I have today.

His baggage as heavy as it was, today is more mine that his. The rotten children that used to "steal" my husband's attention, now want my attention too just as much as the little ones. I no longer get introduced as the stepmother but as mom. I really hate that word...just saying!

I'd like to think that I have the same proud feeling when they excel as their own father has and maybe even more since they're girls and not that he's a bad father but guys just don't understand women but I won't say that too loud, don't ever want to hurt his feelings. With that being said I can also feel their pain/hurt/frustrations and without a doubt I would make it better if I could. I know I would always do anything in my power to help them through any rough roads that might come their way.

I might not be proud of many of the things I might have said or even done but I'm happy that we stuck it out together and never once gave up on us as a family.

Now as I see them grow and find their own way through life I just want to hit that pause button  so I can have more girly talks, see more chic flicks, go on trips that lead to nowhere  and just enjoy their company. I'm so used to them always being there and being the peanut gallery that always has something to say about everything and anything, which can be frustrating but I have learned to love it. They have been there through thick and thin. They help out with the little ones, run to the mall with me for something that should take a second and ends up being 3 hours with me and more importantly they have sat there and listened to me bitch and complain when I'm having a bad day...yeah I'm not ready for them to really grow just yet. Even when one is 23 and the other is 21!!!

If only I had time to cook...too

“I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see.” ~John Burroughs

Life has become quite a challenge lately...I remember before I had kids, I thought I had somewhat of a stressful life. I had just moved from Puerto Rico to NY and I immediately found out that living here, life was just hectic and extremely fast paced to what I was accustomed to. Now, fast forward to being married with kids and a full time employee I look back and say "Damn, I had it good".

Today, I find myself wondering how do women manage to work 40+ hours a week, be stuck in traffic 2+ hours a day. Go to the gym (loose the baby weight), go home to homework, prepare lunch bags for the next day, give bath to all 3 little ones and then COOK? Really, how come they have time to do it and I'm here complaining...

My husband has been doing a lot of hinting that he would like a home cooked meal and of course lunch for the next day prepared every night. I wouldn't mind cooking more often but if I do that means that there will never be time to relax or unwind or that my bed time would be some time after 1am...am I being selfish? 

I look at the kitchen with such a discouragement lately. I don't mind cooking on the weekend while I wash 10+ loads of laundry, clean the house, take care of bratty-crying-whining kids...but ughhh I'm just not motivated during the week after doing my nightly routine when I come home from work. 

Oh and did I say I rarely go to the gym just so I can maybe get home earlier or shop for anything that's needed for a special homework assignment?...

I wonder if I will ever be with these group of ladies...Mrs. Mj Crocker